Josh and Failure Vs. The World: Day 42

Josh and Failure Vs. The World: Day 42

Here’s how I failed today:

I didn’t get up at 10 am, jog for five miles, only eat kale, and invent a cheap and clean renewable energy source.

More importantly, I failed to be at peace with my life – I’m terrified that it’s going to take an enormous amount of pain for me to appreciate what I have always had. I wish I could get to that point INSTEAD of having the pain. And instead of dying, I’d like to transform into a being of pure energy and somehow still be eligible for a SAG card.

I’m holding myself back from being in a relationship because I am not ok with myself. So that means it’s time for me to deal with that.

Perhaps that’s what I need to focus on today. I’m going to do my best to relax. (If you need to go somewhere to laugh out loud, I totally get it)

Relaxation – how many of my problems would be solved by relaxation? Fantastic question.

(Idea for a sitcom – a main character name Roz has to learn to relax – the show is called “Roz-laxation” – Clearly Jean Smart would play a supporting role of some kind).

I’m also in a silly mood today, which is no good for anybody – so maybe I’ll just end the blog with this:

GIRAFFE 1: She said she thought I was smug.

GIRAFFE 2: This is why happens when you try to date a zebra.

GIRAFFE 1: I tried to explain to her that I only look smug because I’m so much taller.

GIRAFFE 2: I don’t think that’s it. You come off as smug.

GIRAFFE 1: Really?

GIRAFFE 2: It’s not like you’re a bad person.

GIRAFFE 1: How do I come off as smug?

GIRAFFE 2: Remember when Simba came by and asked how we were doing, and you said “no worse than usual.”

GIRAFFE 1: How is that being smug? I’m depressed. That’s my thing.

GIRAFFE 2: Well, yes, it’s fine to do that with friends, but Simba’s more of a loose acquaintance.

GIRAFFE 1: You do remember that a week ago, he ate my sister.

GIRAFFE 2: Circle of life, buddy. She was sick.

GIRAFFE 1: She was getting better.

GIRAFFE 2: The last thing I want to do is get dragged into a conversation about assisted suicide with you.

GIRAFFE 1: Now who’s being smug.

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